What a disaster. I'm 2-10-1 ATS heading into Monday night, and the two wins were with the Redskins (Cowboys missed a game-tying FG in the closing seconds) and the Titans (had to convert a fourth and goal to cover.) I could very easily have gone 0-12.
In fairness, I hated this slate ahead of time, and the only game I felt good about was the Jaguars at home against the Texans who hadn't been able to protect their already injured QB. But the game becomes a lot easier for the offense when Blake Bortles is channeling Nathan Peterman (or is it Peterman who channels Bortles?)
I actually had a good day in fantasy with Kareem Hunt, Todd Gurley, Jarvis Landry and John Brown in some places, it's looking less likely by the week I'll be saddled with buying steaks and should the Giants beat the Falcons I'll be down to the end game (final four) in my last Survivor Pool. But the terrible week ATS and the 1-4 mark in the Supercontest carry more weight.
• I actually had the Chiefs as 6.5-point favorites and should have been on them per my made-up lines, but I faded Jeff Erickson, self-hating Bengals fan, who made the Chiefs his best bet.
• The Bengals brought a sling shot to a nuclear war. Down 7-0, Marvin Lewis punted on 4th-and-4 from midfield, right after the Chiefs drove down and scored with ease on their first possession. You have to know what you're up against and adjust accordingly. That was game over then and there. A.J. Green went 14-7-117, but that was all they had.
• Pat Mahomes had 358 yards and four more TD passes to go along with 45 yards rushing. He took two sacks and threw a pick, but everything seemed easy.
• Hunt had a monster day - 15-86-1 and 6-5-55-2 as a receiver. It's a great sign he's being used regularly in the passing game again - it makes him a top-five overall player.
• Travis Kelce had an efficient 5-5-95, Tyreek Hill 10-7-68-2 and 10 rushing yards, though he dropped an easy TD and Sammy Watkins 7-4-74. Even Spencer Ware chipped in during garbage time with 89 YFS.
• You have to love how the Cowboys played for the long FG that became too long after a snap-infraction penalty and lost. The Redskins previous possession - two runs into the teeth of the defense, then a QB scramble with no chance of a first down wherein Alex Smith went out of bounds to preserve time for Dallas - was equally bad. The Eagles lost, but hard to see them not winning this joke of a division.
• Zeke Elliott finally had a bad fantasy game, though the passing game opened up slightly with Michael Gallup cantering for a 49-yard TD, Allen Hurns going 6-5-74 and Cole Beasley going 8-7-56. Dak Prescott had a respectable 273 yards, one TD and 7.8 YPA, while rushing for 33 yards and a score, but he lost two fumbles, one of which resulted in a Redskins TD, and took four sacks.
• Adrian Peterson looked good, rushing for 97 yards, but no Redskins receiver had more than 43 yards. Josh Doctson showed a pulse, but until further notice he's going down the DeVante Parker career path.
• Todd Gurley is having a throwback season - think peak Emmitt Smith/Terrell Davis/LaDainian Tomlinson/Priest Holmes. An easy 15-63-2 on the ground and 4-23-1 through the air. He's not even working that hard. His backup, Malcolm Brown (13-for-65) actually had more yards.
• Jared Goff also had an easy day - 18-for-24 (8.4 YPA) two TDs, no picks and two sacks. Brandin Cooks and Robert Woods split the workload, with Cooks scoring the TD.
• Greg Zuerlein made all seven kicks he attempted (3 FG, 4 PAT) - he's once again a top-five kicker.
• Matt Breida got hurt again, and Raheem Mostert (7-for-59) outperformed Alfred Morris (9-for-25) in his absence. C.J Beathard was bad, but George Kittle (8-5-98-1) had a big game and is a top-5-ish TE.
• Justin Tucker missed his first career PAT in the gusty wind to prevent overtime and a nearly 50/50 chance at a Ravens cover. That said, the Saints were the better team, moving the ball more easily against the Ravens defense than the Ravens did against theirs.
• Alex Collins had a poor game, but he's supplanted Buck Allen almost entirely in the running game the last two weeks. Joe Flacco was okay, and he reconnected with John Brown (7-7-134-1) on two big plays. Michael Crabtree (9-5-66) led the team in targets but as usual did little with them.
• Alvin Kamara re-established himself as the team's top back (17-64-1) while Mark Ingram went 12 for 32. Both backs caught two passes each. Taysom Hill could cut into their production near the goal line, however.
• Cody Kessler took over for Bortles (5.1 YPA, two lost fumbles), but didn't fare much better. It's anyone's guess who will start next week. T.J. Yeldon got stuffed on the ground but caught five passes for 40 yards and the team's lone TD. Carlos Hyde will be back next week, and possibly Leonard Fournette in Week 10 after the bye. Donte Moncrief led the team in receiving, albeit with Kessler at QB in garbage time.
• Lamar Miller had a good game - 22-100-1, though he caught only one pass for -1 yard. DeAndre Hopkins went 8-3-50-1 while being shadowed by Jalen Ramsey, while Will Fuller put up an 8-6-68 line. Deshaun Watson had a modest game while playing with a lead.
• The Browns went to overtime again and lost. I suppose I shouldn't be upset about a push against the spread because the Bucs missed a short FG in regulation, but the Bucs punted the ball back to them with less than three minutes in overtime, and the Browns fumbled the punt return! Even then, their defense held Tampa to a 59-yard FG attempt, but of course below-average kicker Chandler Catanzaro nailed it. Keep in mind I didn't need the Browns, who were getting three, to win, just to tie.
• Baker Mayfield put up modest numbers against Tampa's weak defense, but he led the team on late comeback and made the big throw to Jarvis Landry (15-10-97-1) to tie it. David Njoku (6-4-52-1) was the only other receiver of note. Nick Chubb went 18-80-1 in his starting debut, but didn't catch a single pass.
• Jameis Winston had an odd line - 365 yards, but zero TDs and two picks. He did rush for 55 yards and a score, however, but lost a fumble. Consider him a rich man's Blake Bortles - all over the place, but useful in fantasy.
• Mike Evans led the team with 11 targets, nine catches and 107 yards, while O.J. Howard (9-5-67) and Chris Godwin (6-5-59) also chipped in. DeSean Jackson and Cameron Brate had 48 yards between them.
• Peyton Barber was ineffective, and Ronald Jones and Jackson scored two of the team's rushing TDs. Neither back made the case for more work.
• The Eagles were up 17-0 after three quarters and lost 21-17. Carson Wentz had a solid day - 321 passing yards, two TDs, zero picks, but he took two sacks and lost a fumble.
• Alshon Jeffery (10-7-88-1) and Zach Ertz (11-9-138) were the leaders in an uncharacteristically narrow receiving tree. Dallas Goedert (5-4-43-1) was also a factor. Nelson Agholor (7-6-20) is gunning for the lowest YPT record among qualifying receivers apparently.
• None of the Eagles backs did anything. Wendall Smallwood led the team with nine carries for 32 yards.
• Cam Newton had a monster fourth quarter to finish with 269 yards, two TDs, no picks and two sacks. He also led the team with 49 rushing yards.
• Christian McCaffrey had seven carries for 29 yards and caught all six targets for 51 yards. It's the lack of TDs rather than workload that's hurting him. Devin Funchess was the only receiver of note, going 11-6-62-1. Greg Olsen scored the go-ahead TD but did little else.
• Adam Thielen extended his 100-yard receiving streak to seven and now is within one of Calvin Johnson's all-time record. No other Vikings pass catcher had more than 34 yards.
• Latavius Murray went 15-69-2, providing serviceable production in Dalvin Cook's extended absence.
• Sam Darnold was overmatched - 4.9 YPA, three picks, three sacks and a lost fumble. He's not yet making the Giants regret passing on him for Saquon Barkley.
• Robby Anderson (10) and Chris Herndon (7) led the Jets in targets. Jermaine Kearse (two targets, zero catches) fell off the face of the earth.
• Kerryon Johnson (19-158, 3-2-21) is the second best back in his draft class, but LeGarrette Blount (10-50-1) and Theo Riddick (out) limit his upside. Should Riddick miss extended time, Johnson's added receiving would give him a nice boost.
• Matthew Stafford had a good game, but spread the ball around, and tight end Michael Roberts caught both the TDs.
• Brock Osweiler was serviceable, 7.7 YPA, two TDs, zero picks, but lost top target Albert Wilson early and also spread the ball around. Danny Amendola (7-6-84-1) was his top receiver, but no one else saw more than three targets, except Kenyan Drake (8-4-15.) Drake made up for it on the ground with a 6-72-1 line thanks to a 54-yard TD. Frank Gore had 10 ineffective carries for 29 yards.
• Andrew Luck didn't need to do much in a blowout win, but still managed four TD passes, two of which went to T.Y. Hilton, but Chester Rogers led the team with 40 receiving yards.
• Marlon Mack had another big day - 19-126-1 and 3-2-33-1. The game script could not have been better in a blowout win.
• Derek Anderson played about how one might expect an out-of-the-league long-time backup to play - three picks, 5.6 YPA, two sacks, one lost fumble. At least he got Kelvin Benjamin (5-4-71) involved.
• LeSean McCoy left early with a concussion, and Chris Ivory filled in nicely (16-for-81, 6-3-25) under the circumstances.
• Adam Vinatieri injured his groin in the game and could miss some time. The 45-year old is four points behind Morten Andersen on the NFL's all-time points-scored list.
• The Patriots know how to defend a last-second Hail Mary - let the guy catch it at the two and then use the whole team to keep him out of the end zone as time expires.
• Mitch Trubisky put up great fantasy numbers, but did not have a good real life game. For starters his 6.7 YPA included the meaningless 54-yard Hail Mary catch by Kevin White. Trubisky also threw two picks, took two sacks and missed open receivers. All told he had 333 passing yards, two TDs, and 81 rushing yards and a rushing TD.
• Trey Burton led the team with an 11-9-126-1 line. Tarik Cohen went 12-8-69-1 while Allen Robinson and Taylor Gabriel combined for 30 yards. Jordan Howard had another quiet game (48 YFS.)
• Tom Brady had an unremarkable 277 yards, three TDs and one pick, while taking only one sack on the road against ostensibly one of the league's best pass rushes.
• Josh Gordon (7-4-100) led the team in receiving and made a key catch on fourth down. His rapport and trust level with Brady are growing, but he looked a little sluggish running in the open field. Julian Edelman went 8-5-36-1, while Chris Hogan put up a 7-6-63 line.
• Sony Michel left the game in the first quarter with a left knee injury, and James White (11-for-40, 10-8-57-2) had a huge game in his stead. Kenjon Barner (10 for 36) also got extra work. Should Michel be seriously injured, I'd expect the Patriots to look for another back.
• It's bizarre the Titans kept throwing out of the shotgun to get less than a yard in the closing seconds and on the failed two-point conversion. I'm not against throwing in short yardage, but it better be off a play action or some other kind of fake and look incredibly easy. Otherwise, you're essentially turning a 4th-and-1 into a 4th-and-6 for no reason.
• Dion Lewis 13-for-91 and 6-6-64 was the offensive star of the game, breaking tackles and spinning ahead for extra yards. Derrick Henry went 12-for-33 and caught two passes for 32 more yards.
• Tajae Sharpe (9-7-101) led the team in receiving while Corey Davis (7-3-10) with at least one drop had a bad game .
• Austin Ekeler (12-for-42, 7-5-26) had a modest game filling in for Melvin Gordon. It's often easier to make big plays when you're the fresh-legged, change of pace option rather than the workhorse.
• Tyrell Williams had his second straight big game on modest volume 4-4-118-1. It's strange the Chargers drafted Mike Williams (3-1-55-1) with a top-10 pick last year despite having Keenan Allen (5-5-72) and Tyrell Williams already on the roster.
• Philip Rivers had another business-like day - 306 yards, two TDs, 11.2 YPA, no picks and two sacks for only nine yards. He's having one of the quieter MVP-level seasons in recent memory.