One week away from the hysteria on television, one week away from watching hockey analysts excuse themselves live as their cell phones buzz with news of perhaps the latest move to befall the National Hockey League, one week away from non-stop coverage on all the Canadian sports channels regarding where a fourth-line enforcer may end up by the noon deadline on March 3… in other words, one week away from heaven.
No, it's not logical by any stretch of the imagination, but trade deadline day has become an unofficial holiday in Canada, a day when fans are tempted to call in sick, then come to their senses and go to work only to leave an extra browser window open the entire day just to check out if a deal may have happened. Those that don't come to their senses and are found out by their bosses? A pat on the back the next morning, and a gentle "don't let it happen again". Why? Because it's trade deadline day. Everyone gets into the trade-deadline-day spirit in Canada!
By now, the suspects to look out for have been rammed into our heads by all the sports stations in Canada: Ray Whitney of the Carolina Hurricanes (who is okay with getting traded, as long as he is getting traded to the Pittsburgh Penguins to play with Sidney Crosby), one of the Montreal Canadiens's Carey Price or Jaroslav Halak (both of whom have high trade values for different reasons: Halak, because he's playing well, and Price, because he parties well), Marty Turco of the Dallas Stars (who have apparently placed their long-term goaltending hopes in Kari "Lets It In" Lehtonen), the Edmonton Oilers's Sheldon Souray (who used to score more often than he was on the ice for other teams' goals, but now just gets injured more often), and then there's the countless top-end prospects going the other way. I mean, why a team would give up the future of the organization for a guy who can barely play in the present in Souray is beyond me, but therein lies the mystery and joy of the day: Surprises and illogical moves abound! Yay!
Last year, according to The Sports Network (TSN in Canada; also known as Toronto Sports Network to everyone not residing in Toronto for its often-considered biased nature towards reporting all things Maple Leafs, Blue Jays, and Argonauts), there were 22 moves on trade deadline day, resulting in a record 47 players being moved. From 2006 through to 2008, each year saw a record 25 trades, with 40, 44, and 45 players being traded. So, clearly, the annual tradition of fire sales in the NHL is becoming more widespread.
A lot of notable players have already been traded in recent weeks: Ilya Kovalchuk (Atlanta Thrashers to New Jersey Devils), Cam Barker (Chicago Blackhawks to Minnesota Wild), Matt Cullen (Carolina Hurricanes to Ottawa Senators), Olli Jokinen (Calgary Flames to New York Rangers), and Dion Phaneuf (Calgary Flames to Toronto Maple Leafs). Still, rest assured that in addition to Whitney and company, the likes of Boston Bruin octogenarian Mark Recchi, New York Islander Doug "Dead" Weight, and, maybe, just maybe, Anaheim Duck captain Scott "Will I Stay or Will I Go" Niedermayer are all available.
It occurs to me that what I'm writing may be construed as sarcastic, but truth be told it isn't. Actually, Niedermayer being traded would be a relatively big deal (not so much for the other two; though I'm sure if Recchi and Weight are traded each deal will be hyped up to the extreme anyway).
Really, in all honesty, there's no guiltier pleasure for me than to do nothing on trade deadline day and that tradition will probably recur his year. Anything that allows me the greatest chance at not missing the slightest swap. So, come next Wednesday, there I'll sit, in front of my television like a glazed-eyed moron, believing TSN's Darren Dreger that the Florida Panthers trading Jordan Leopold to the San Jose Sharks for a second-round pick is only a matter of the hugest importance.
Trade deadline day: It's one week away… and I can't wait.