There's no doubt the first 55 minutes of Thursday night's game was brutal, but the ultimate payoff (and this coming from someone who picked the Jets ATS) made it worth it. Seriously how can an offense look so bad – they had five possessions that started in New York's territory and produced three points – for the whole game and then produce a 95-yard drive like that at the end? Whatever you think of Tim Tebow, the guy clearly has a flair for the dramatic (check out NFL.com's power rankings)…Denver's defense obviously deserves a ton of credit for the team's three-game winning streak. Forget Rookie of the Year, there's a strong case to be made Von Miller has been the NFL's defensive player of the year, period. He's been fantastic against the run and also leads the league with 16 QB hits…For some reason, Tebow called a timeout with three seconds left in the third quarter (and the play clock wasn't running out)…Mark Sanchez already has three "pick-sixes" this season..."If you get sacked in the end zone, it's a safety." Thank you Brad Nessler! I actually don't have a problem with Nessler and Mike Mayock, who is obviously a big upgrade over Matt Millen, but both of them mispronounced Plaxico Burress' name all night long…It certainly appeared like Shonn Greene's injury was a blessing in disguise for the Jets, as Joe McKnight was an upgrade. Not only does the playbook expand greatly with him in, but he's also more explosive as a runner (not sure he could handle 300 touches though). McKnight totaled 121 total yards, which Greene has bettered in just one of his 39 career games played. McKnight will likely go back to being a complementary player with Greene returning, but especially with his receiving ability, he'd become an extremely intriguing fantasy option should he ever become the feature back.
The footage of this lady thwarting an invasion from her home video is capturing enough, but frankly, the humor involves her TERRIBLE ability to describe what's happening. I mean there were clearly two culprits right away, and how in the world should that outfit be described as a white shirt? You know, the one covered 90 percent by a black sweatshirt. And I'm guessing they used the tire iron to break in, not through the doggy door.
Oakland's 24-7 halftime lead really hurt Carson Palmer's fantasy day, although a TD run salvaged it. He should be considered a weekly QB1 moving forward…I have no idea what to make of the Raiders' receiving situation, as Darrius Heyward-Bey was seeing a lot more action than Denarius Moore before leaving with an injury. Fantasy owners need to take a wait-and-see approach, as it's tough to predict who'll get the targets on a weekly basis…The jury's still out on Christian Ponder the passer, but he's certainly shown he's quite athletic…Tough break for Adrian Peterson owners. Hopefully his absence won't be lengthy…At 4-1, the Raiders have the AFC's best road record this season…With 65 touches over the past two games, Michael Bush is an absolute horse. If you own both, Bush owners shouldn't exactly be hoping for a Darren McFadden return at this point. The latter has more talent and is more explosive, but Bush is an every down back who gets all the goal-line work and is plenty capable in his own right. Oakland should easily be considered the favorites to win the AFC West right now.
Roger Craig (not the former SF RB) makes a mockery out of Jeopardy.
Matt Moore has got 8.5 YPA with a 6:1 TD:INT ratio over his past three games, completing 70.8 percent of his passes. Moreover, he's also taken just three sacks over that span, and remember, before last year when he played for a dreadful Carolina team that gave him a quick hook, Moore got 7.9 YPA with an 8:1 TD:INT ratio over five starts in 2009. He's 27 years old and already looks like an upgrade over Chad Henne. I hope Miami fans didn't have their hearts set on Andrew Luck…Stevie Johnson hasn't scored since Week 6 and doesn't have a single 100-yard receiving game all season. He also gets to face Darrelle Revis on Sunday…The Dolphins haven't allowed a touchdown over their past 12 quarters.
Andy Dalton was picked off three times Sunday, but he also threw for 373 yards (totaling 405 yards) in Baltimore, getting 8.3 YPA while taking just two sacks without having A.J. Green at his disposal. I certainly can't say I expected it, but he sure looks like a keeper. Another reminder just how little we should pay attention to the preseason…I found it funny the person who tackled Torrey Smith by his hair (looked painful) was Pacman Jones…As long as Green is out, it appears Jerome Simpson will be a fantasy option…Referee Ron Winter "all but disappears" in this pileup.
The song is actually catchy, but it's the photos of people at Walmart that make it worth watching.
One week after Phil Dawson missed a 22-yard field goal (albeit the snap was bad) that cost Cleveland the game, his 38-yard miss Sunday nearly did the same. It was close and worth taking a second look, but apparently kicks that go over the goal post aren't reviewable…This pass by Blaine Gabbert defies explanation. One of the worst I've ever seen…With eight seconds left on second down from the 1-yard line and no timeouts, the announcer said "I think you have to throw it here." Really? Do you think so? The same wasn't true on the following play with just three seconds left, however (they chose to pass), since it would be the last one regardless. Ultimately, the Jags cost themselves a play by not calling their final timeout after gaining a first down with 41 seconds left. There was just 18 seconds left when they ran their next play, and the final one of the game came on a third down.
Man wearing "I'm a drunk" shirt arrested for DWI.
In the first halves of games this season, Dez Bryant has 24 catches for 413 yards and five touchdowns, while after halftime, he has just 11 receptions for 172 yards and one TD. In fact, he has more receiving yards total in first quarters alone (269) than he does during the second half of games, with four of his six touchdowns coming in the opening 15 minutes. I have no idea what to make of this. But I do know no one in the NFL has more receiving yards with fewer dropped passes (one) than Bryant…Pretty crazy the Cowboys came so close to losing with Tony Romo playing such a fantastic game. His ability to extend plays and escape the pocket is highly impressive…I'm beginning to think Mike Shanahan is unpredictable when it comes to his usage with running backs…While holding for a potential game-winning field goal in overtime, Romo tried to call a timeout, only Dallas didn't have any left (he later admitted he thought you were given three in OT), but Shanahan called one a split second earlier, preventing the delay of game penalty. Dan Bailey's kick would have easily missed from five more yards out, which is just another example of how stupid "icing" a kicker is.
Jordy Nelson has got 8.5 yards-after-catch per reception this season, which easily leads all wide receivers (minimum 30 catches). It obviously helps having Aaron Rodgers as his QB, but Nelson is absolutely legit…Kellen Winslow had a big game, but his drop while wide open in the fourth quarter on a two-point conversation attempt that would have tied the game was brutal…LeGarrette Blount is a grown ass man. What an incredible TD run…Nice to see Mike Williams has a pulse still…Late in the second quarter, Tampa Bay attempted a surprise onside kick that went just seven yards before coming to a stop, when a Green Bay player dove in and touched it. Luckily for the Packers, the only dumber player on the field was the Bucs one who illegally touched it right before, negating the recovery with absolutely nothing to gain by grabbing it in the first place.
After kneeing cop in groin, drunk driver poses for an epic mugshot.
Usually I use this space to bitch and complain, a therapeutic session in which I don't have to pay a shrink. But I must say, as a Matthew Stafford owner who was facing someone who had Calvin Johnson in my home league, I was rather fortunate to get five passing touchdowns with none to Johnson. Pretty lucky…The Lions are the first team in NFL history to win three games in a season in which they trailed by at least 17 points (h/t Adam Shefter)…Cam Newton already has more rushing touchdowns (by two) than any rookie quarterback ever. He's going to be a fantasy monster for years to come…Kevin Smith's performance had to be one of the most out-of-nowhere in recent memory, but with such weak alternatives, there's no way it should be written off as a fluke. It needs to be taken in context against such a poor Carolina defense that has allowed an NFL-high 14 rushing TDs this season, but Smith looked good and most importantly, he can be a real threat as a receiver. Smith is an injury risk and was out of the league up until three weeks ago, but he's now seemingly fully recovered from his knee surgery and worked hard while unemployed, and the former third round pick totaled 1,262 yards with eight touchdowns as a rookie. With Jahvid Best's status so uncertain and in such an explosive offense, not only is Smith the obvious No. 1 waiver wire pick this week, especially so late in the year, if I had all $100 (or $1000) of my FAAB remaining, I'd spend it all on him.
Accused Florida butt injector appears to have tried her own product.
To call John Skelton inaccurate Sunday would be a massive understatement. I guess Kevin Kolb's job will be his when ready after all…The 49ers held the ball 44:16 in Week 11, which is the most by any team in a game this season…David Akers attempted a whopping four field goals in the first quarter and five in the game's first 20 minutes Sunday (and six in the first half)…Beanie Wells' lost fumble was Arizona's first by a running back this season…Remarkably, Alex Smith's interception Sunday was just his second in the red zone in his entire career…The 49ers are 10-0 against the spread this season.
Manny Pacquiao apparently suffered foot cramps during his fight with Marquez (for the second fight in a row and on the bottom, which means it's unrelated to this), but who wants to see them fight for a fourth time over a matchup with Floyd Mayweather? I like Freddy Roach, but the answer is no one. It's humorous that Pacquiao is now clearly the one ducking Mayweather (although I can't blame him), but anyway, I guess it's good news in that I won't spend my bank account flying to Vegas it.
Marshawn Lynch has now scored in six straight games and has somehow had plenty of fantasy value despite getting 3.4 YPC (and often much lower) in six of nine games this year…Sam Bradford looks like a real problem, especially with that contract. He's taken 31 sacks over eight games this season and hasn't thrown multiple touchdowns in a game since Week 12 of last year. Matthew Stafford threw as many touchdowns Sunday as Bradford has all of 2011…I've had a somewhat disappointing but not terrible year ATS (around .500) and been moderately successful betting on teasers, but each week I pick a "best bet," and it's been a total disaster, with my latest being the Rams. I've lost three in a row and am an ugly 3-7-1 on the year. Embarrassing. You should be fading me.
This goal is "absolutely brilliant." I can't disagree.
Ryan Mathews had two more fumbles Sunday, as he continues to struggle with ball security and injuries. Quite the enigma, that Mathews…Norv Turner burned two timeouts during a failed challenge. Why even wait until the offseason to fire him? I get in-season coaching changes rarely work in the NFL, but at this point, what is there to lose? San Diego hasn't won a game since Week 5…Hate to see Jay Cutler out with a broken thumb (and no, not just because we look alike), as it really hurts a team that probably was the Packers' biggest threat in the postseason (and this coming from a 49ers fan). Cutler had really been playing well of late too, so let's hope he can return before the season ends. I'm sure the breaks are different, and I'm in no way questioning Cutler's toughness, but it's funny Ben Roethlisberger is playing through a similar injury, but then again, he has the makeup of those who were around when the opposable thumb became evolved. And let's not worry too much about Cutler, who just last weekend reportedly once again got engaged to Kristin Cavallari.
Possible U.S. governor ends up homeless in Ukraine after searching for would-be bride who was fake.
Enough with the excuses, Chris Johnson has been a disaster this season, and his big Week 10 now looks worse after Kevin Smith came off the bench (and his couch) to rack up more than 200 yards against the same Panthers team. Johnson somehow managed just 13 rushing yards on 12 carries Sunday and after scoring 23 touchdowns over his previous 24 games, he's hit pay dirt just twice over his past 12 contests. Johnson's 1.9 YPC after contact this season ranks 59th among 63 qualified running backs…It came against a prevent defense, but Jake Locker impressed when he replaced an injured Matt Hasselbeck, showing good athleticism and arm strength. Nate Washington owners maybe shouldn't be rooting for a speedy recovery by Hasselbeck…After taking 13 sacks over the first three games this season, Matt Ryan has been taken down just seven times over his past seven contests. Atlanta has been disappointing, even if regression wasn't unexpected, but 10 wins still aren't out of the question.
Teacher admits to selling grades to pay off debt.
Vince Young looked legitimately nervous early on, but he certainly settled down, culminating in an impressive eight-minute game-winning drive. He wasn't a bust or anything, but his six carry, five rushing yard performance really capped his fantasy performance…Brandon Jacobs is slow and is frankly, pretty terrible right now. Then again, the Giants' blocking this season has been absolutely atrocious…Since he became relevant in Week 3, Victor Cruz has produced a pace to finish a 16-game season with 88 catches, 1,566 yards and 10 touchdowns – and that's with him getting just two catches for 12 yards without a score in one game. Cruz is tied for fifth (with Michael Crabtree) among wide receivers with nine broken tackles, and to put that in perspective, Calvin Johnson leads the league in the category with 11, and he's played 656 snaps this year. Cruz has played 386 (Crabtree has just 387). Cruz should be treated as a top-20 fantasy WR…I'm so confused about DeSean Jackson's taunting penalty AFTER THE PLAY negating his 50-yard gain, because it was offsetting. Apparently, the Giants committed the best penalty ever on the play, because if they hadn't, the Eagles would have netted 40 yards as opposed to zero. That makes sense. And by that I mean zero.
I personally wouldn't have voted for Justin Verlander for MVP, but it has nothing to do with him being a pitcher. I don't get the thought process behind lessening his impact by saying he plays only once every five days. Yes he doesn't play defense, but he factored into 969 plate appearances, which is obviously more than any hitter, and if you don't want to listen to me, just look at how Vegas' odds change daily based on starting pitching. In comparison, the needle would barely move at all if even Albert Pujols were to sit out one game.
After averaging 148.0 yards over his first five games this season, Wes Welker has averaged 57.6 yards in five games since. While regression was a certainty, I'm also convinced he's playing more hurt than the Patriots are letting on…Tyler Palko is a disgrace to Shane Falco…Not one tight end has ever scored more than 10 touchdowns three times in their career and only Antonio Gates has done so in back-to-back seasons (h/t Bill Barnwell). Meanwhile, Rob Gronkowski has 10 touchdowns over his first 10 games this season after scoring as many during his rookie season. We are looking at a special player (with a special QB throwing to him), so records are going to be shattered. Gronkowski is on pace to finish the year with 90 receptions, 1,288 yards and 16 touchdowns. From the tight end position, that makes him easily a top-10 fantasy commodity…During a pregame segment before Monday Night football, ESPN interviewed a bunch of random people named Tom Brady in the Boston area. When the real quarterback was later brought on, Rick Reilly told him they also came across 47 Gisele Bundchens as well, to which Brady responded "really??" dead serious. I love the thought of living in a world in which Tom Brady is apparently extremely gullible. Apparently, if Brady were a part of your group of friends, he'd be the one picked on incessantly.
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