As a 34-year-old constantly dealing with knee injuries playing half his games in a park tough to homer in, Carlos Beltran wasn't exactly a target of mine entering 2011. Not only has he managed to stay healthy, he's hit about as well as any point in his career so far this season. Beltran really is a health risk, so it might be worth shopping him around, but there's certainly nothing fluky about his performance. In fact, his walk and K rates are both better than his career norms, and his current BABIP is just .288. While no longer close to the same terrific defender he once was, the move to right field may keep Beltran's legs fresher, and it's hard to argue with the results. He won't help as a base stealer like he used to, but after totaling 17 home runs over the past two injury-riddled seasons, Beltran is on pace to finish with 31 homers, 81 runs scored and 91 RBI – not bad for someone with such a low ADP.

Here's a clip of the Marlins' announcers making fun of an emotional fan who also happens to be a man baby.

I know I tell myself this every time, but I swear, next time I go to Las Vegas, I'm being more responsible.

Jake Peavy pitched far better than his ERA indicated during his first start of the season last week, and after spinning a complete game shutout Wednesday against an Indians team that leads the American League in runs scored, he's now sporting a 12:0 K:BB ratio. Peavy, who underwent surgery for an injury never before suffered by a pitcher, says he's just about 80 percent right now, and we likely won't see the 100 percent version until 2012 if at all, but his fastball has shown plenty of velocity, and his changeup and slider remain terrific pitches. He's without question one of the bigger injury risks there are, and he'll have to deal with a poor White Sox's defense behind him, but Peavy can pitch like a top-20 fantasy starter while his health permits.

If you're going to run on the field, at least make it noteworthy like this guy.

Man licking shoes on subway? Man licking shoes on subway.

I was worried about Adrian Gonzalez's power this season coming off shoulder surgery, but apparently the effects were only a slow April, because he sure looks fully recovered in May. Over his past 15 games, Gonzalez has hit eight homers while racking up 22 RBI – a category in which he leads major league baseball. In fact, he's on pace to finish with 143 runs batted in. It sure helps switching from an anemic San Diego lineup to Boston's. Gonzalez's walks are way down this season, and while that fundamentally makes sense considering opposing pitchers can't pitch around him the same way they could while he was wearing a Padres' uniform, it's interesting to note he's actually seen just 40.3 percent of pitches inside the strike zone, which is by far a career-low. Nevertheless, Gonzalez's willingness to be aggressive is a welcome sight to his fantasy owners. He's easily a top-five fantasy commodity.

While I'd prefer a burger from a legit restaurant, I'm a fan of In-N-Out Burger, but these people and this lady take it to the next level.

Speaking of hamburgers, this guy is a little nutty.

While getting out of Chase Field is generally a good thing for pitchers, I figured the move from the N.L. to A.L. would more than negate that, so I didn't treat Dan Haren as an elite fantasy starter entering 2011. As a result, one of the best hurlers in baseball isn't on any of my teams, as Haren has been mighty impressive so far. His 3.9 FB/HR|PERCENT| and .243 BABIP are obviously going to regress, but no one should expect a pitcher to finish with a 1.93 ERA. And as for that hit rate, his career BABIP is .290, and the Angels currently have the second-best UZR in major league baseball, so that number won't necessarily take a massive jump. Moreover, Haren's 8.4 K/9 combined with a 1.1 BB/9 is about as good as it gets. He's actually thrown his cutter more frequently than his four-seam fastball this season for the first time in his career, and it just shows you don't need extreme velocity (his average fastball velo has been 89.8 mph) to be a successful pitcher. Over Haren's last three starts, which have come against @BOS, CLE and @TEX, he's recorded a 23:1 K:BB ratio. The Angels' top-two starters can match any in baseball.

Through rain, sleet or snow, this guy's lawn will be mowed.

For the second week in a row, I give you a lacrosse clip, this one a pretty sick trick play.

It's becoming clear Ben Zobrist's outlier season was last year and not 2009, as he's off to a .289/.379/.566 start. After playing as the toughest hitter's park in baseball last season, Tropicana Field has been the third hardest place to hit so far in 2010 (fun with small sampling with Park Factors: Yankee Stadium has actually played as a pitcher's park, including home runs, over the first seven weeks of the season), so he has that working against him. While mostly the same hitter, the two glaring differences between Zobrist's 2009 and 2010 campaigns were BABIP and HR/FB|PERCENT|, and both are back up this year. Since he continues to be a terrific base stealer (80.3 percent success rate in his career) and is also a run producer, few middle infielders are as well rounded as Zobrist. He's a perfect example of a last year's bum paying off in a big way.

I'll let the next two links' headlines speak for themselves:

Maniac decapitates elderly British tourist on holiday island of Tenerife.

87-year-old Nigerian faith healer has 86 wives. 

Rajai Davis is hitting .245 with zero homers and just five RBI on the year and has even been platooned a bit recently, but he's not a bad target for owners in need of speed. An injury kept him out of action for 20 days, but if you were to prorate his stolen bases on a per game basis, he'd be on pace to finish with 85 steals over a full season. And that's with just a .284 on-base percentage! Davis is likely to start hitting better, and one hot streak would probably get him back in the leadoff spot. Manager John Farrell's perpetual green light combined with that speed (he's been successful on 80.1 percent of his SB attempts since his rookie year), Davis could make a major impact in fantasy leagues over the rest of the year.

I doubt Mentos and Diet Coke really killed this man, but this doesn't look like it felt good.

I won't get into any politics behind it, but I'd sure be onboard with this project coming to fruition.

Bud Norris has always been interesting thanks to a strong K rate, but it looks like he's taken the leap this season, as he's really improved his control. His current 3.06 BB/9 rate isn't great, but it's significantly better than last year's 4.51 mark, and it plays just fine with a 10.80 K/9 rate that is the second highest in all of baseball. While his walk rate was one area of concern, another was Norris' problems with left-handed batters, as he relies heavily on his slider. In fact, he's thrown the pitch 37.5 percent of the time this year, which is second only to Brett Anderson in major league baseball. It's a devastating offering to righties, who have hit just .151 off Norris in 2010, but southpaws have batted .316 and have connected on five of the seven homers he's allowed this year. Looking deeper, Norris' line drive percentage jumps from 8.9|PERCENT| against right-handers to 23.9|PERCENT| versus lefties, so he'll typically be more reliant on matchups than most pitchers, meaning teams who can stack their lineup with left-handers pose a problem. Still, there's a lot to like about the 26-year-old, and his future looks bright, assuming all those sliders don't tax his arm too much.

Planking? Really?

This lady is having a bit of trouble exiting the ocean. 

I was once treated like a criminal for accidentally having a bottled water in my carry on, so I'm not exactly impressed airport security eventually caught this guy, but his ambition was pretty outrageous.

What more can be said about Jose Bautista at this point? You've probably heard most of these, but he's hit five homers in Target Field this year while the Twins as a team have hit six. He'd easily be on pace to shatter the American League record for walks if not for him missing eight games. His current batting line at home is .429/.571/.1.095. According to hittrackeronline, he leads MLB with six "no doubt" homers and just one was deemed "lucky," and he's already matched his HR output to right field from all of last season with one. He entered the week with an .868 slugging percentage, which would be the highest in major league history. Also, objects in Bautista's mirror appear exactly the size they really are, he's allowed to bring anything he wants through TSA, he knows the contents of Marsellus Wallace's briefcase, and people with Alzheimer's remember him. And he's doing so in an offensive environment that's significantly down right now. Unsurprisingly, Bautista is seeing just 35.8 percent of pitches thrown to him inside the strike zone, and with his willingness to remain patient, Adam Lind (when he returns from the DL) and Aaron Hill are going to have serious RBI opportunities from here on out. When you consider his third base eligibility and Toronto's aggressiveness on the base paths, it's hard not to rank Bautista as the No. 1 fantasy player right now.

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